I woke up grumpy this morning. No, I am not talking about my husband. He begins his day an hour or so before me. My mood this morning was a disgruntled one. No particular reason, just disgruntled, as in, not gruntled, I guess.
I took Gretta for a short walk because we expect temps in the triple digits again today, and any outside activity must happen before 8am. She really just wanted to stop and sniff every little thing, and by the time we arrived back at the house, I was still feeling cranky and out of sorts.
It is a Saturday and since Husband is not working, I wanted to make some nice omelets for our breakfast. But I also wanted a swim, and again, in this heatwave, even a swim has to happen before it gets unbearable outside. I told him we’d have a good brunch after my swim and out I went.
And I floated. I let the crystal clear water simply hold me up and gently take me around the pool. Surrounded by a beautiful silence. No pool accessories needed. Just me and lots of water. I floated under the trees that hang over our fence from the wooded area behind our yard.
With my eyes open, I floated and floated. I watched a butterfly flutter from tree to tree. A sudden wiggling of some branches told me that squirrels were nearby as usual. Thankfully, this early in the morning the local wasps tend to be calm and a bit lazy, so they did not concern me as I floated on top of the water. The only sounds are from the gentle little waterfall into our pool.
As I watched the swaying trees above me, I once again knew that this was my new sacred space. My place to connect with God in a way I cannot do anywhere else. Can I try to describe the original “Sacred Space” in my life?
I am taking a deep breath right now as I take myself back to this special time in my life, in my family’s life. Our large church had moved out of a restrictive and controlling denomination and we became non-denominational in a time before “non-denominational” became its own denomination. (IYKYK)
We longed for extended times of simply being in God’s presence. We were learning that worship can be much broader and at the same time, much simpler than we had experienced before. We needed a chunk of time to be with God without restraint due to a sermon or classes beginning at a certain hour. It felt like being hungry for more of something, without even knowing for sure what the “something” was. So, Saturday night Sacred Space was born, led by our close friends, Bob and Barb, a gifted worship leader and sound engineer couple.
Sacred Space was an evening every week dedicated to unlimited worship. Without agenda. Without an order of service. Without a spoken message. Without interruption. Just live music and open-ended time in the presence of God.
I would enter the huge sanctuary with my Bible, my journal. And lots of kleenex. Those first weeks of Sacred Space were full of tears for me. I did not always know why. But the tears would flow as I basked in the love of One So Mighty. What else could I do?
I usually had a favorite corner to sit and listen, and quietly scribble my thoughts and questions about God and who He wanted me to be. Sometimes I would stand and sing, swaying with the beautiful music. Many of the stories in Walking Butterfly are from my intimate encounters with God during Sacred Space.
In fact, I just remembered that my friend, Joyce, wrote the following as an endorsement at the front of my book. “For years I watched my dear friend Susie Klein, worship in corners of rooms. While others lifted their hearts to God in more outspoken ways, Susie’s worship – her Eucharistic practice, if you will – unfolded quietly as she wrote in her journals. This book is a result of her honest and private conversations with her Best Friend, seen through the perspective of time and wisdom. Let her light a candle in an unseen corner of your life. Joyce Milton”
There were also moments of pure bliss when I could not be still and I danced in my corner of the sanctuary. I reveled in being a much-loved daughter of God and the only way I could express such joy was with movement. I am SO SO grateful that this was in the 90s when we were not yet recording every single experience with our phones. I know that I was not as graceful as I felt. But I did not care, because it was for Him and no one else. It was quiet and gentle and felt wonderful.
Remember when I mentioned that we had left a restrictive denomination? I had grown up believing that dancing was a sin. That moving to music was evil and dangerous. When boys at school invited me to dances, I literally responded with, “Sorry, dancing is against my religion.” Cringe! So the idea of dancing as worship to God was a pretty big deal for me. I was finding true freedom!
The beautiful thing about freedom is that it opens the door to huge creativity. Soon we were seeing wonderful new expressions of worship from everyone in the church. My current home is now decorated with many treasured results of those extended worship times together. The pictures above are on my walls and they constantly remind me those special evenings.
As we continued to gather on Saturday nights, some would ask if they could express their worship through painting, sculpture, or drawing. The answer was always “Yes”. The artist would lay down a small tarp, set up their easel and paint and listen to the music for a while. And then they would paint whatever felt right. Whatever spoke about the music and worship for them.
My friend Stephanie did not draw the dancing girl with dark hair with me in mind. But later, she mentioned that it made her think of me sending my praises up to The Father, and now it hangs cheerfully in my dining room. I love it! The sculptor did his work in the sanctuary one night and another friend used his gift of photography to capture the beautiful moment that hangs in my hallway.
Freedom can be messy. It can be unexpected and even disturbing to some. Our nights of Sacred Space were a safe place to experiment and lean into new ways to give ourselves to God and listen to Him. It was beautiful. It was Heavenly.
There were no sermons. No chatter from the church platform between songs. No announcements or offerings. It felt natural and real. Kind of like my floating time this morning. I did not ask God for anything. I didn’t even tell Him anything. I just floated and enjoyed His trees.
And it was sacred. It washed away my bad mood. It took away my disgruntlement… It was time with Him. I was just trying to get rid of my bad mood. But floating on my back, gazing at the swaying trees above became my sacred place. The word, “sacred” means that something is dedicated, or set apart for “the worship of a diety”.
You may accidentally stumble across your sacred space like I did, or you may want to intentionally find it. What is your go-to happy place? What is your Peter Pan “happy thought” that helps you fly?
If your home is a busy one, your sacred space might be in the back of a closet with a box of chocolates. God will meet you there. For some, it is driving alone, or getting sweaty on a long run. God will ride with you or run alongside you.
If you are lucky, you will be part of a group of like-minded seekers like I was, and together you will be able to gather together simply to bask in God’s love for a nice chunk of time. I would LOVE to hear about your sacred space.
Could you leave a comment here or on my Facebook post? Tell me about your sacred space. Freedom leads to creativity, and it will be fun to hear about your creative ways to find Sacred Space.
Love, Susie
Walking Butterfly 
My sacred space was in earlier years in my yard in the “Secret Garden”, where I wrote the “Secret Garden Chronicles” throughout my blog during that season of time. I would sit in the garden under the shade of the huge magnolia tree, with my Bible open and a hymnbook and my journal…and wait for the Holy Spirit to “move me” with His Word and song and His beautiful creation all around me. It was a time to listen for His words to come to my heart as I listened to the birds singing and watched the trees swaying…it was a special time in the years following the death of our son from cancer…a time of healing for me that was sorely needed. I fear that I am not doing as much “sacred space” worship these days as I did then…it’s either too hot to go outside or I just don’t seem to have the same drive that I had then…but you have inspired me to think about this more fully again. I believe we go through seasons of life when we need this more than other times…and maybe that’s why it becomes more sacred to us because it is not so commonplace. I appreciated this post so much, Susie, and the spirit with which it has been written…it may be time to get back to those “sacred spaces” again as we approach the coming years that are looking pretty bleak if you look at what is going on in the world around us. We need to draw nearer to the cross these days…and hide ourselves in the shelter of the Rock of Ages. Thank you for this thoughtful, spirit-breathed post.
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